This week's releases. Ha! If only life were that simple.

In a year that, not yet into its third month, has already given us such cinematic gold as Black Swan, True Grit and The Fighter, I’m sure you’ll agree it seems a sad week for cinema when Friday’s two biggest releases were Big Momma’s House 3 and a documentary about Justin Bieber.  Yes, some genius decided that the lovable scamp with such delicate, feminine features yet the eyebrows of Dennis Norden has had, in his sixteen years in this world, a life interesting and inspiring enough to warrant a feature length documentary.  But you know what, no matter how tempting it may be to write the boy off as an irritating, weasely, repugnant, sickly monkey-boy slice of thoroughbred Americana who epitomises everything wrong with contemporary popular culture, I feel I have to constantly remind myself that he is not the enemy, and I implore you to do the same.  Put aside that hatred people, he’s just a boy.  And there’s something pretty messed up about grown adults hating a child.  The real villain of this piece is a man who for some reason goes by the name of Usher, and who I'm told ‘discovered’ young Bieber.  Now I don’t claim to know a lot about this character but I have no reservations whatsoever about focusing a direct beam of concentrated hate at a man who is knowingly using this boy to arouse naive pre-pubescent girls for his own financial gain.  Know your enemy friends, and target your anger accordingly.  

But shit, sorry, this is supposed to be a film blog sooooooooo...Big Momma’s House.  Oh, Lord.  I don’t know where to start.  So I won’t, you know the deal anyway. 

What a week.

Is it just me or does all the overblown hyperbole we are force fed about film piracy damaging the film industry and endangering future film production suddenly seem a strangely attractive notion?  If only any of it were true.